Alrighty, so we’ve basically scraped the bottom of the toilet bowl for the B branch, surely it’s only uphill from there, right? Well……
Bye!Helvetica!Woah, shelter!
So, since Washington St. & Harvard Ave. are essentially copy-pasted, I’m doing both as one entry. What sets them apart from the other stinkers? Well, you got a tactile safety strip, wheelchair lifts, and shelters with trashbins. Woah!!! Still, no benches!
A train cresting the hillThat’s quite the view!
The good: There’s shelters and wastebins! Neat!
The bad: The damn platforms are STILL very narrow! Also, no benches!
Nearby points of interest: Same shopping on Commonwealth Avenue as from the other stops.
Transit connections: Green Line (B) MBTA bus (65 @ Washington St., 66 @ Harvard Ave.)
Overall, these stations are STILL awful! But, they’re marginally better!!!
Alrighty, so since most of these stations are similar enough in appearance, let’s take a look at them all, gauntlet style! So, which stops will be touched on here? To answer that, we have: South St., Chestnut Hill Ave., Chiswick Rd., Sutherland Rd., Warren St., Allston St., Griggs St.-Long Ave., and Packards Corner. Our standard layout is a measly yellow line on pavement barely deep enough to acommodate ONE person. Uh oh, that’s not good! The only thing that could be worse is if they WERE the grade crossings.
Oh no.
These platforms are so thin, it feels like it could easily graze a fat man! And, I say that, as a fat man! Yeah, that’s not exactly a good testament to how small the platforms are. Hell, even a more slender person would have trouble! Step too close forward and you’re trespassing. Too far back, and you’ll be struck by the traffic on Commonwealth Avenue! Yeah, that’s a good sign of things! And if you need accessibility, FUCK YOU! These platforms are so small they can’t even accommodate a wheelchair ramp even if they were level! They’re probably too small for a wheelchair, period!
Helvetica! Just look how tiny the platforms are!A train going the other way!Chestnut Hill Ave. from on the train!More helvetica!OH FOR FUCKS SAKE, AGAIN?!Warren St.’s sorry platformWoah, there’s a shelter! Too bad the station still sucks!
The good: Nah.
The bad: EVERYTHING! THESE STATIONS SHOULD NOT EXIST! WHY, HOW, WHY?! THESE ARE SOME MAJOR STINKERS! NOT EVEN NEWTONVILLE HAVE SUCH SORRY PLATFORMS, AND THAT STATION GOT A 1!!! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK HAPPENED?!
Okay, hear me out: Why don’t we neuter Commonwealth Ave to two lanes, with a narrower side street (why do these exist?!) on each side, so we can widen the Green Line’s reservation and, gasp, give the stations actual amenities?! Woah, shocking idea!
Nearby points of interest: The Chestnut Hill reservoir seems like a nice place to chill. There’s also a few interesting businesses lining Commonwealth Avenue, and US-20 splits off at Packards Corner.
Overall, NO. JUST, NO!!! I GENUINELY THOUGHT NEWTONVILLE WAS DOGSHIT WHEN I WROTE THAT REVIEW, I REALLY DID. BUT NOPE, SEEMS LIKE WE SCRAPED THE BOTTOM OF THE TOILET BOWL ON THIS ONE!!!!!
Transit connections: Green Line (B) MBTA bus (various, at various points. Too lazy to name.)
New Balance is a major manufacturer of athletic footwear and apparel, headquartered in Boston, Massachusetts. They also own the Warrior Sports brand, who manufacture ice hockey equipment. So, if you’ve ever gotten your hands on a Bruins player’s hockey stick, odds are good it’s a New Balance product. Hell, if you ran cross-country or track for a college or high school team, odds are good you probably also used a New Balance product. They also happen to own the practice arenas for both the Boston Bruins and the Celtics and located their headquarters to the Boston Landing development. Now what the HELL does an athletic apparel & equipment company have to do with trains, buses, or whatever else I normally talk about here?!
Helvetica!
I’ll tell you what: they paid for a train station to be built here!!
New Balance and Morrison-Knudsen!
Being the newest station on the line (opened in May 2017!), it’s got enough things you’d expect from a newer station. Full-length highs, a pedestrian bridge, and amenities on the platform are all accounted for. Now, as this was the point I realized “holy CRAP, it’s cold!” (this was visited before Newtonville), I didn’t spend too much time on the platform, however there was garbage disposal and benches. There’s elevators though, and they work! Neat! In a way, this place feels kinda like a prototyped version of Pawtucket, actually, now that I think of it. Only downside is the lack of the Spun sculpture. Also, my biggest pet peeve is the only MBTA bus to stop here, the 64, doesn’t deviate in, although there isn’t much room for that anyways. But, I still stand by the fact the nearest stops for the 64 are a bit of a ways away. One thing I apparently missed (likely because I just wanted to skedaddle due to the cold) is there’s an elevator on the Everett St. overpass. Neato! But, outside rush hour, who the heck is going to want to wait that far away? Offpeak trains only board in the two cars closest to the engine anyways! And, it’s not even the most pedestrian-friendly entrance either, as you have to go around if you need accessibility! Actually, now that I think of it, the biggest improvement would probably be a pedestrian overpass to the other side of the Mass Pike.
The overpass!Looking the other way!New Balance headquarters!WGBH headquarters up the street!
The good: It’s in a new development paid by New Balance! It’s also ADA compliant and is a short distance to downtown Boston in a largely transit-starved (though not to the same degree as some other areas!) region. Plus, outside of the New Balance area, it’s largely residential in nature, so there’s reverse commuting opportunities to Natick, Framingham, and Worcester as well.
The bad: I guess the worst part would have to be the lack of pedestrian access to the other side of I-90, and the relative lack of pedestrian friendliness on Everett Street. Also, the relative hike to catch the 64 to either Oak Square or Kendall/MIT.
Nearby points of interest: The associated development’s seemed to have attracted some interesting businesses and restaurants, by the looks of it. You’ve also got New Balance’s flagship store, and the Warrior Ice Arena (the Bruins’ practice arena) along with the Auerbach Center (the Celtics’ practice arena), so there’s that. And there’s also a Dollar Tree nearby! Neat. And, for those who watched WGBH as a child, their headquarters (and Newbury Comics HQ, for those into music & comics!) is nearby too.
Transit connections: Commuter Rail (Worcester Line) MBTA bus (64)
Overall, it’s a nice little station, designed primarily to serve a development in Brighton. I gotta check this place out more, and if you’re an athletic person who happens to buy New Balance, I’d say it’s worth at least a consideration.
Ah, Newtonville. What a lovely little villag- oh, what? You mean I gotta check the Commuter Rail station? Well, how bad can it be? It doesn’t- OH MY GOD!!!
Woah, this is nice!OH YOU KNOW IT’S GOOD WHEN THE SIGN IS HELVETICA CONDENSED, RATHER THAN HELVETICA BOLD!!!
NOW, BECAUSE OF THE TRAFFIC WHIZZING BY, AND THE IMMENSE AMOUNT OF IT, I’M GOING TO HAVE TO YELL JUST TO BE HEARD!!! SO, LET’S LOOK INTO THIS HELLHOLE OF A STATION!
WOW, WOULD YA LOOK AT THAT! NOT EVEN ACCESSIBLE!!! HARVARD STREET’S OVERPASS IS THE SAME CASE, EXCEPT THAT ONE HAS HELVETICA BOLD INSTEAD OF HELVETICA CONDENSED!
NOW, WHY THE HELL IS THIS A SINGLE SIDE PLATFORM ON A DOUBLE TRACKED MAINLINE?! WHAT IS THIS, MADISON?! HOLY SHIT THIS IS AWFUL! LET’S SEE WHAT ELSE IS ON THE PLATFORM, WHICH GOES ON FOR FAR LONGER THAN ANY TRAIN’S DOORS WILL OPEN UP FOR. SO, YOU GOT A SHELTER, DOT MATRIX SIGNS IN BOTH RED AND YELLOW! WHOOP DE FUCKING DOO!!!!! AT LEAST THERE’S A GARBAGE BIN AND BENCHES IN THE SHELTER. NEAT.
WOW, THIS IS AWFUL.
ALSO, AS A FUN TIDBIT, I LIKE HOW SOMEONE GRAFFITIED “NEWTONVILLE” ON ONE OF THE HUNKS OF WOOD. ALSO, THE FACT THE GLASS DOOR FOR THE SCHEDULE PLAQUE IS BROKEN, MEANS THEFT IS POSSIBLE HERE! I WAS LEGITIMATELY TEMPTED TO TAKE THE SCHEDULE PLAQUE, BUT I DIDN’T. AS THEY ALWAYS SAY ON THE RADIO, I’M A GOOD PERSON! I PAY MY TAXES! IT’S A CRIME TO PAY MORE THAN A DIME! OH! IT’S THE LAKE SHORE LIMITED! AND FINALLY, MY TRAIN IS PULLING UP! YAY!!!!!!! OH YEAH, THERE’S ON-STREET PARKING!
DOT MATRIX IN YELLOW!AND IN RED – IT DOESN’T COME OUT WELL!WOAH, AMENITIES!THE SCHEDULE PLAQUE!THE MIGHTY LATE-FOR-SURE LIMITED!!!!!!AND HERE COMES MY TRAIN! TO BACK BAY WE GO!
The good: UHHHHH, IDK. THERE’S BENCHES AND A SHELTER???
The bad: EVERYTHING. THE EXISTENCE OF THE STATION, THE SINGLE TRACKING OPERATION, THE SINGLE PLATFORM, THE MASS PIKE, THE LOW-LEVEL PLATFORM, THE STAIRS – BY THE WAY, DON’T LOOK DOWN!!!!!
Nearby points of interest: I GUESS IT’S COOL THERE’S A STAR MARKET ABOVE THE PIKE! ALSO, NEWTONVILLE LOOKS LIKE AN INTERESTING AREA!
Alrighty, Ashmont, here we are! The end of the Red Line’s other branch! What do we have here? Oh, it’s just a decent terminal. Let’s see.
The busway
So, the busway is served by several routes running out to Ruggles, Mattapan, and even …Brockton?! Huh, guess I’ll be returning when I start reviewing BAT’s routes. Plus, we have the Mattapan extension’s ROW with a balloon loop. No PCCs to be seen here, though. Let’s go into the station itself.
Balloon!
Alright, so the station itself is glass-roofed and is quite modern, actually. Only nitpick are turnaround procedures, as they depend on turning trains around beyond fare control. But, whatever, it’s what it is. You’ve also got fare control, a coffee shop, and a fair amount of CharlieCard machines. In terms of aesthetics, I like it, and it even has the ringing bells for departure like the other termini. Yay!
Glassy!Fancy!LOVE THOSE HEADWAYS!!!I genuinely like Ashmont for what it is.Who the hell calls it Peabody Square?
The good: It’s got a number of buses, BAT, and it’s the terminal for both the Red Line and the Mattapan extension. Also, the glass aesthetics are just PERFECT for here. However…
The bad: There’s supposedly a Pedal & Park, but I didn’t see it anywhere. Also, the fact two trains can’t lay over on the platform at once is annoying, as is the lack of BAT fare machines. What were they thinking? Yeah, those are my major nitpicks. Also, fare-controlled transfers from the Mattapan to the Red?
Nearby points of interest: Ehhh, there’s a few businesses nearby, but it seems mostly residential at a glance.
Transit connections: Red Line (Ashmont) Mattapan Line MBTA bus (15, 18, 21, 22, 23, 24, 26, 45, 215, 217, 240) BAT (12)
Overall, it’s a pretty decent station, even has inter-RTA transfers. Only issue is that there’s no fare machines for that “other RTA” or controlled transfers between the Red and Mattapan.
I’LL TELL YOU HWAT, MY NAME IS HANK HILL AND I SELL PROP- oh, not Arlen. Alrighty, fine, fine. Welcome to Arlington Street. Goddammit. Man, the Central Subway gets a bit tedious. Fortunately, this is the last station!
Helvetica!
Arlington’s located at the intersection of Boylston and Arlington Streets, at the southwestern corner of the Boston Common. Looking around, it’s REALLY, REALLY disgusting and dingy! YIKES. Plus, this feels like the backrooms. At least crossovers are free and it’s accessible!
See ya!
Yeah, it’s also not too well lit on the tracks, but whatever. Moving on to upstairs, the ceilings are freakin’ disgusting, and apparently there’s restrooms here! Sadly, I didn’t peek, nor did Miles have any insight on them from when he made his bathroom map. Oh yeah, history! The headhouses also look old, like your stereotypical old-school subway headhouse.
Another train peeks inHistory!EWW THOSE CEILING STAINS DEAR GODEnter if you dareThe stairs. Yeah, they look a lot like Kenmore’s.
The good: It’s at the Boston Common! It’s also a short walk from the opposite end of Newbury Street from where Hynes is located. There’s also a couple of bus connections here too, and it’s accessible.
The bad: It’s freakin’ DINGY! I’d argue, it’s WORSE than Hynes, as the ceilings NEED a powerwash. I should’ve worn gloves when holding to the escalator handrails.
Nearby points of interest: Newbury Street and the Boston Common!
Transit connections: Green Line (B, C, D, E) MBTA bus (9)
Overall, eww. I hate this station even more than Hynes. And, since the ceilings grossed me out enough, I can’t score this high. Bleugh!
Ah, the venerable Kenmore. The closest rapid transit stop to Fenway Park, and the one where all the sports nuts flood to during baseball season. What do you hide?
The Citgo sign looms ahead, from Lansdowne
Walking to here from Lansdowne proved to be an easy enough affair: just walk down Brookline Avenue, and right down US-20. And, sure enough, I was soon met with Kenmore’s glass-canopied busway.
Kenmore’s got a busway?!
So, I went into the station itself with its old school-feeling stairs down, and was greeted with a lot of green. There’s also plenty of sports-themed advertising around here, and even some history! Neat! Unfortunately, the platforms aren’t much to talk about aside from the quad-tracking design.
Down the stairs!Historical photos!NBA ads!Yep, one of the few quad-tracked stations on the systemGreen tiles galore!LET’S GET KINKI!
The good: It’s not dingy like Hynes or Arlington! I’ll give it that much, and it’s better-lit! Furthermore, it has an actual busway! I’m also sure it’s enough to handle a bunch of rowdy Sox fans. The tracks are also organized, with the B branch getting two, and the C and D sharing two. You also have multiple ways in, via passageways and elevators!
The bad: Eh, I’m not sure if light rail can handle sports surges, but whatever. They sure like pipes, though!
Nearby points of interest: Fenway Park & the Citgo sign!
Transit connections: Green Line (B, C, D) MBTA bus (8, 19, 57, 60, 65)
Overall, it’s a decent enough station. At the least, it’s better than Hynes, and isn’t as grossly dingy. Plus, it’s accessible! Furthermore, buses actually have a proper busway to turn in and out of!
Oh boy, Hynes! Let’s take a look at one of Boston’s conv- wait, what? OH, it’s a Green Line station. Alright. Goddammit. Let’s look at the Hynes Green Line station.
The train I took to Hynes, from Kenmore
Alrighty, so I got off the train after arriving from Kenmore and WHEW IS IT DINGY AS HELL! Oh GOD. Buzzing lights, concrete, bricks everywhere. Dear GOD is it terrible! Bleugh! Even the mezzanine is the same way. Accessibility? Forget about it! Although, I’ll at least give the T credit for investing in the installation of elevators here for accessibility. The headhouse is signed though, and there’s a bus stop with a large shelter across from the station, serving….just the 1. Yeah. It’s dingy, but not much else to say aside from the lack of ADA compliance.
Helvetica!Type 8! Also, EWW THAT CEILING!That’s very dingy!The mezzanine!
The good: It’s by the namesake convention center! There’s also plenty of shopping around Newbury Street, with it even being closed to vehicles at times. The bus shelter is also decently-sized, if it’s still there.
The bad: It’s really dingy! And it’s not accessible! And did I mention how disgusting it is?
Nearby points of interest: The station’s namesake and Newbury Street!
Transit connections: Green Line (B, C, D) MBTA bus (1)
Overall, I’m not big on this one. Yes, there’s a lot of shopping and a convention center, but the station itself is dingy and grossly dated. At least there’s also bus service!
Um, yeah, this is a bit awkward. So, I guess, I’ll say that the rule kinda is “if there’s helvetica, it counts”. Which, to my awareness, means these four stops + City Point all count. Now, there’s more to Columbus Avenue as well, including a bit of a unique thing that sets it apart from other busways in the region. Let’s look.
Walnut Avenue!
Now, all these stops have LED displays showing when the next buses are coming, have benches, T lollipops, and the Helvetica signage. But that’s not what sets these apart. What sets these apart, are how they’re configured in the road: in the center lanes.
Going out to Egelston Square, I was convinced these were absolutely dangerous and death traps, and overall just poorly placed/designed. Well, it turns out……I was proven wrong firsthand, and genuinely surprised. Walking down the 1/2 mile or so of center-running bus lanes from Walnut Ave. to Dimock St., I was genuinely surprised at how often people were actually respecting the paint, as well as how surprisingly easy it was to jaywalk. Actually, it also felt safe, I’ll add. Yeah, shocker, I’m used to yelling “HAIL MARY!” when jaywalking, but given they shrunk the lanes down to as small as doable, I was shocked to find that yes, I can actually jaywalk and not run the risk of being struck. Now, is it psychological in nature? Probably. But then I heard an ambulance rushing down Columbus Avenue and, they too used said bus lanes. Hell, even SCHOOL BUSES were using it. So, seeing all that firsthand and that they actually work BETTER, I got just one question:
WHY THE FUCK ISN’T THIS ON WASHINGTON STREET?! WHY CAN’T WE HAVE THIS FOR THE SL4 AND SL5 INSTEAD?! HOLY FUCK! THIS WOULD MAKE MILES UPON MILES OF DIFFERENCE!!!
Also, the lights looked funky like the lights on the Green Line’s median-running sections.
Weld Avenue!Bray StreetOops, the screen at Dimock St. is ruined!WEEWOOWEEWOOWEEWOO!!!
The good: THESE WORK A WHOLE LOT FUCKING BETTER THAN WASHINGTON STREET’S BUS LANES – OR HELL, LITERALLY ANY IMPLEMENTATION OF BUS LANES I’VE SEEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE, MAYBE SAVE FOR THE CTFASTRAK BUSWAY OR THE TRANSITWAY/CHELSEA BUSWAY!!! WHY THE FUCK DON’T WE HAVE THESE ON NORTH MAIN STREET, RIDOT?! WHY CAN’T WE HAVE THESE ON WASHINGTON STREET, MBTA? MAYOR WU?!
The bad: You kinda can’t turn left, but if you’re a pedestrian, that’s a nonissue.
Nearby points of interest: Egelston Square!
Overall, HOLY FUCK WAS I WRONG ON MY PRECONCEIVED NOTIONS! WHY CAN’T WE HAVE THESE?! JUST, WHY?! THEY WORK HELLA BETTER, FEEL CONSIDERABLY SAFER, AND ARE MUCH MORE LIKELY TO BE RESPECTED!
Rating: 10/10
Yeah, I just pulled a 10/10. Rare, ain’t it? This is the kind of shit we NEED to see more often! And, for once, I’ll have to admit the T actually did something right here.
Alrighty, the last one! Let’s look at the final Silver Line station (that is, barring South Station, but that’s a special one 😉 Stay tuned!). Meet: Eastern Avenue.
Coming on up!
So, it’s literally the same as Box District, Bellingham Square, and Chelsea. Yeah, not much new to see here. Heated shelters and the usual. Oh, but there’s a bike rack! Albeit, it’s no Pedal & Park. That would’ve been nicer, given the proximity to the Chelsea Greenway. Oh yeah, Massport’s shuttles stop here! There’s also a parking garage for, I think, airport employees. Yeah, there’s just not a lot here. Let’s get to it.
The drawbridge looms…
The good: Well, it’s your usual Chelsea bus station. Heated shelters and whatnot are the norm. Massport also stops here, which is a bonus.
The bad: You’ll PROBABLY learn to hate this station should the drawbridge be up, if buses are held here. Also, not a lot to note.
Nearby points of interest: Airport parking and a few parks nearby!
Transit connections: Silver Line (SL3) MBTA bus (112) Massport (77)
